Archive for the ‘Kid Quotes’ Category

Kaelinisms: Theology Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 8:01 pm

Kaelin: (incredulous) Mama, did you know that JESUS is GOD TOO???
Me: Yes, I did know that.
Kaelin: Isn’t that weird?

Kaelinisms: Where Does She Get This Stuff??? Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 1:07 pm

The other day I asked Jens if it was “normal” for 3-year-olds to talk the way Kaelin does, because it catches me off-guard at times.  His response: “Doesn’t matter, because we don’t have a 3-year-old.  We have Kaelin.”  True enough.

Kaelin: Daddo, what are you doing?
Daddo: I’m putting on deodorant.
Kaelin: What’s that?
Daddo: Sometimes when grownups get sweaty or dirty, they need deodorant to keep them from getting smelly.
Kaelin: (after a moment of consideration)  Mama struggles with underarm odor.
Daddo: She… does?
Kaelin: She needs more deodorant.

Ok, I’m TOTALLY OFFENDED.  Evidently I’m going to have to stop reading Kaelin her bedtime story after I go to the gym because DUDE…

And on another note, I would like to know who’s been teaching Revelation to my daughter.  Seriously. 

Kaelin: (coming downstairs first thing in the morning) Daddo?
Daddo: Yes?
Kaelin: Are these the last days?
Daddo: Last days of what?
Kaelin: The last days of the world.
Daddo: Um….

Kaelinisms: Yikes Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 7:05 pm

One day I’ll start posting something besides Kaelinisms.  Like maybe Koren’s newsletter that should have been up days ago.  But not today, because I’m sleepy.

Kaelin: Mama! I fell off the chair!
Mama: I’m sorry, are you ok?
Kaelin: NO. That chair wanted me to get hurt.  You need to tell that chair, “Chair, if you ever do that to Kaelin again, I’m going to THROW YOU IN THE FIRE and then I’m going to HIT YOU!”
Mama: That sounds a little extreme.  Maybe you could just be more careful next time.
Kaelin: Ok.

Kaelinisms: Nice Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 7:01 pm

Kaelin: Is anyone going to be here tomorrow?
Daddo: Yes, Mama and Daddo and Koren will all be here.
Kaelin: Is anyone else going to be here?
Daddo: No.
Kaelin: I think we need someone else.
Daddo: Why do you think we need someone else?
Kaelin: It’s just nicer.
Daddo: Why is it nicer?
Kaelin: Well…you’re nice too.  I’ll keep you here.  Do we have any biscuits for breakfast tomorrow?

Kaelinisms:  Boobs Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 5:52 pm

“Mama, can I help with the boobs?  I’m really good at light boobs.”
“Bulbs, Kaelin.  Light bulbs.  And no, you may not.”
“Can I help with the light bloobs?  Can I please help with the light boowbs?”

She seemed to think her pronunciation was the reason we wouldn’t let her assist in the changing of the light bulbs, and continued asking with slightly varied intonations and vowel sounds, insisting that she was “really good” at light bulbs.  Somehow, we were unconvinced.

Kaelinisms: Conglomerate Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 1:57 pm

(protecting her lunch from the dog…who was several feet away taking a nap)
“NO, Hastings, you CAN’T HAVE my SANDWICH.  No!  NOT YOUR JOB, BUDDY, NOT YOUR JOB!

(while bending over, hands around her ankles, waiting for Daddo to wipe her post-poop butt)
“Boy, Daddo.  You might wanna trim those toenails.”

(while observing Koren in his jumper)
“Mama!  Look at Little Buddy!  He’s goin’ to TOWN! Go Little Buddy!

Mama: Kaelin, pick up your clothes and put them in the hamper.  I’m not going to tell you again.
Kaelin: Mama, you’re obsessed with picking up my clothes.

Lucky Duck, er, Dog

Filed under: Holidays,Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 10:41 am

We’re doing Kaelin’s Christmas Hanukkah-style this year, and giving her one present per day until Christmas.  We find that this works better because she needs a day to play with every toy she gets and trying to rush through all the gifts on Christmas just lessens the fun for everyone.

Today, she received Lucky, the Incredible Puppy, a mechanical dog that responds to voice commands such as “sit,” “lay down,” “come here,” etc.

She’s having a great time with it, but doesn’t quite understand the limitations of pre-programed commands.

“Lucky, help me clean up the floor.”

Lucky does his best to accommodate.

“…Why is he standing on his head?”

All I have to say, is that if they ever DO create a robotic dog that helps one clean up the floor, I AM SO THERE.

Kaelinisms:  Poop Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 7:55 pm

Kaelin: Daddo, wanna come play in my corral*?
Jens: (in the middle of a diaper change) I can’t right now sweetie.  I’m wiping poop off Koren’s butt.
Kaelin: (appalled) Daddo, you can’t poop on Koren’s butt!

*Kaelin’s term for a fort made out of pillows

Kaelinisms: Excuse Me Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 10:45 pm

I had just picked Kaelin up from school and was talking to Koren’s teacher when I heard her say sweetly, “Excuse me.”

“Yes, Kaelin?”
“I just said excuse me because I tooted.”
“Oh?”
“Yes.  Luke told me that.”
“He told you to say excuse me when you toot?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that’s probably a good rule.  Is Luke one of your friends?”
“No.”
“He isn’t?  Why not?”
“I don’t like Luke.  Because he’s a boy and I don’t like boys.  I only like girls.”
“Why do you only like girls?”
“Because girls are better than boys.”
“Oh?  Why are girls better than boys?”
“Because they play together and not throw things.”

Kaelinisms: Toilet Paper Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 9:57 pm

“Mama, the potty isn’t flushing…”

I entered the bathroom and called for backup as I saw the water pouring over the side of the toilet and splashing onto the floor.

“Kaelin, how much toilet paper did you use?”

“Too much,” she said matter-of-factly, then left the servants her parents with the mess and went to find something more interesting to do.

Gender Aware… or Not

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 6:40 pm

(during bath time)
Kaelin: Hey look!  Koren has one of those things like Daddo…
Mama: What things?
Kaelin: A belly button.

Kaelinisms: Oops Edition

Filed under: Kaelin,Kid Quotes — Amy @ 5:10 pm

“Kaelin, can you say the Pledge of Allegiance for Grandmommy?”

“I pledge allegiance, to the flag, of … (falls off chair) Oops!  That’s something you don’t see every day!”

About Me

Hi. I'm Amy. I started this website in 2005 as a place to deposit my journal and photos. It has gone through a few incarnations and masquerades as a family site, but since I'm the only one who contributes to it, it's really all about ME, ME, ME.

Latest Photos